50

First day I planned a memory washout

Knew it wasn’t gonna be an easy thing so I just passed out

Kept it my thing but my spirit lashed out

Nobody was set to f*** with me or I would have bashed out

Second day I cleaned my closet and burned some hay

Smoke started rising as memory started to decay

Felt I didn’t needed it anymore, I ignored, I was so sure

Woke the next morning and f***** my head against the door

Broke a fight, hocked a knife and ripped till it bled up to a gore

Thought about it for a slick second and restarted like before

Marked X at the second day and went moon searching under the sun

Wasn’t sure of my life that was already f***** and only third day had begun

Fourth day kindness shook weakness and I broke a rule

I was a fool that I tried making my corners cool

I should have kept it warm, I should have let it harm

Now f*** the 50 day wham I’m done staying calm

Didn’t do a thing like I had planned to play

I counted numbers trying to look a positive way

What I say I blew an ounce of my mind now what would e say

My heart don’t even ache any more, it’s been dead from the first day

Fifth day I gave up sleeping, sixth came and I kept on bleeding

Seventh was a stir, I popped some pills and dreamed of holy tare

Eight, nine, ten and soon it was situation hard to pretend

Now a game looked serious, all the psycho shit was mysterious

Somewhere I was kept cool; I thank the angel that played a fool

She must have been hurt too but god knows what e do

Everything happens for a reason but nothing came my way

Lived 30 more and rules and shit had already made me grey

I can blame the world I was in but nothing would make a difference

Some say I’m ok but what the f*** is this mind asking for some reference

Fourteen fights 17 transgressions, hazed purple some m*********** on for regressions

Though it’s aggression but what the f*** does it matter for the sake of my confessions?